<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0" xmlns:itunes="http://www.itunes.com/dtds/podcast-1.0.dtd" xmlns:googleplay="http://www.google.com/schemas/play-podcasts/1.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></title><description><![CDATA[14!!!!!!!!!!!! I love to write]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com</link><image><url>https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png</url><title>Sarah-SMR</title><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com</link></image><generator>Substack</generator><lastBuildDate>Mon, 22 Jun 2026 03:37:48 GMT</lastBuildDate><atom:link href="https://smr1432157.substack.com/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml"/><copyright><![CDATA[Smr]]></copyright><language><![CDATA[en]]></language><webMaster><![CDATA[smr1432157@substack.com]]></webMaster><itunes:owner><itunes:email><![CDATA[smr1432157@substack.com]]></itunes:email><itunes:name><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></itunes:name></itunes:owner><itunes:author><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></itunes:author><googleplay:owner><![CDATA[smr1432157@substack.com]]></googleplay:owner><googleplay:email><![CDATA[smr1432157@substack.com]]></googleplay:email><googleplay:author><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></googleplay:author><itunes:block><![CDATA[Yes]]></itunes:block><item><title><![CDATA[Live with Sarah-SMR]]></title><description><![CDATA[A recording from Sarah-SMR's live video]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/live-with-sarah-smr</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/live-with-sarah-smr</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sat, 20 Jun 2026 03:11:21 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/202790827/e6ea32eacd4f64bf71056483629274b3.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="install-substack-app-embed install-substack-app-embed-web" data-component-name="InstallSubstackAppToDOM"><img class="install-substack-app-embed-img" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png"><div class="install-substack-app-embed-text"><div class="install-substack-app-header">Get more from Sarah-SMR in the Substack app</div><div class="install-substack-app-text">Available for iOS and Android</div></div><a href="https://substack.com/app/app-store-redirect?utm_campaign=app-marketing&amp;utm_content=author-post-insert&amp;utm_source=smr1432157" target="_blank" class="install-substack-app-embed-link"><button class="install-substack-app-embed-btn button primary">Get the app</button></a></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Believe in me ]]></title><description><![CDATA[I just wanted to share this one again.&#10084;&#65039; we have new people showing up!!]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/believe-in-me-a42</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/believe-in-me-a42</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Thu, 18 Jun 2026 08:32:51 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://open.substack.com/pub/smr1432157/p/believe-in-me?r=6bkt3m&amp;utm_medium=ios">find it here&#10084;&#65039;</a></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg" width="1080" height="1350" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:1350,&quot;width&quot;:1080,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PUu1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F50ffe7f3-c589-4091-90b4-be4a9e00e8e6_1080x1350.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>I wrote this piece on a random day. But I also feel it matters in a way i can&#8217;t explain. This wasn&#8217;t just to share it again. It was to add on my thought on it.</p><p>I felt like this piece had something more than what I put. So by the end of the week I will be releasing more  parts to this piece&#10084;&#65039; kinda like a series!! </p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Align With Me]]></title><description><![CDATA[Exactly What We Should Do]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/align-with-me</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/align-with-me</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Thu, 18 Jun 2026 08:17:02 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>&#8220;I want you to align with me like I hold you dearly through pain like we are one.&#8221;</p></blockquote><p></p><p>I want you to align with me </p><p>Like I will hold you accountable.</p><p>Like my hands will touch your face softly</p><p>As wind smiles at us in the wild.</p><p>And as we drive on the highway, I&#8217;d like</p><p>You to look at me as we go just for </p><p>A second&#8212;just so I can see your beautiful </p><p>Eyes.</p><p>Your smile shines as bright as the sun</p><p>And your hands grip mine </p><p>Like clouds hold rain.</p><p>Hopefully when we align i can grab you and show you how great you are.</p><p>Your presence alone shakes me to </p><p>Awaken my heart.</p><p>And as my heart pounds I&#8217;d hope you&#8217;d</p><p>Align with it just enough&#8230;</p><p>So I can love you at such times. </p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Hanging with Claude Ferdinand The Cloud at the shops. Not really talking but I’ll type❤️]]></title><description><![CDATA[A recording from Sarah-SMR's live video]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/hanging-with-claude-ferdinand-the</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/hanging-with-claude-ferdinand-the</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 16 Jun 2026 03:46:36 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/202226215/5d5d825647f01d04b5066f334fb3d2df.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="install-substack-app-embed install-substack-app-embed-web" data-component-name="InstallSubstackAppToDOM"><img class="install-substack-app-embed-img" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png"><div class="install-substack-app-embed-text"><div class="install-substack-app-header">Get more from Sarah-SMR in the Substack app</div><div class="install-substack-app-text">Available for iOS and Android</div></div><a href="https://substack.com/app/app-store-redirect?utm_campaign=app-marketing&amp;utm_content=author-post-insert&amp;utm_source=smr1432157" target="_blank" class="install-substack-app-embed-link"><button class="install-substack-app-embed-btn button primary">Get the app</button></a></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Being.]]></title><description><![CDATA[&#120347;&#120361;&#120358; &#120331;&#120354;&#120378; &#120352;&#120368;&#120374; &#120350;&#120354;&#120364;&#120358;...&#120328; &#120343;&#120368;&#120358;&#120366;]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/being</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/being</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 15 Jun 2026 06:04:52 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<h4>&#120350;&#120328;&#120345;&#120341;&#120336;&#120341;&#120334;~ &#120340;&#120354;&#120378; &#120335;&#120354;&#120375;&#120358; &#120346;&#120358;&#120367;&#120372;&#120362;&#120373;&#120362;&#120375;&#120358; &#120356;&#120368;&#120367;&#120373;&#120358;&#120367;&#120373;. &#120331;&#120371;&#120362;&#120367;&#120364;&#120362;&#120367;&#120360;/&#120332;&#120373;&#120356;</h4><div><hr></div><blockquote><p>"The unexamined life is not worth living."</p><p>&#8212; Socrates</p><p></p><p>"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."</p><p>&#8212; Oscar Wilde</p><p></p></blockquote><blockquote><p>"Time is the substance I am made of."</p><p>&#8212; Jorge Luis Borges</p><p></p><p>"Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it."</p><p>&#8212; Haruki Murakami</p></blockquote><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png" width="1536" height="1024" 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https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PKiU!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F905ab5b9-2fe8-473a-b822-3481a494e232_1536x1024.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><div><hr></div><p>The day you wake&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;re not gonna see what you think.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll smell flowers that you never</p><p>Thought to stop by.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll check your watch to make sure</p><p>Time was slow enough to make as many</p><p>Memories as you can. </p><p>Because you know time can kill you.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll stare at the cutting knife as</p><p>You prepare your dinner&#8230;</p><p>And you&#8217;ll wonder how something</p><p>That helps so many could be so ok</p><p>With killing you.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And when you drink water,</p><p>You think of all the ways you could use it&#8230;</p><p>You know you&#8217;ll die without it&#8230;</p><p>And you know you can die with it.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>Maybe it&#8217;s the subtle idea of knowing</p><p>Someone out there is being given a</p><p>Timer with little time to spare.</p><p>But you continue your days&#8230;</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And the Day you wake up&#8230;</p><p>Your gonna see the way the sky </p><p>Look&#8217;s at you different.</p><p>Almost like some silent movie of</p><p>Morality.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll see the trees sway and wonder</p><p>How many have fell over the past year or two.</p><p>because Somewhere out there ones </p><p>blocking the road for an ambulance to get through&#8230; </p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And the day you wake</p><p>Being asleep would never occur to you&#8230;</p><p>Because why sleep when that can turn </p><p>Permanent?</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll realize everyone is living.</p><p>But You&#8217;re just here&#8230;</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being. </p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And the day you wake&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;ll hug your little ones.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>you&#8217;ll tell them about the old times&#8212;</p><p>When the porch lights stayed one and</p><p>You didn&#8217;t have to lock your doors.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll hug your mom&#8230;</p><p>Tell her she&#8217;s the best mom</p><p>You could ever ask for&#8230;</p><p>Or for some of you&#8212;</p><p>You&#8217;ll look at her and ask her</p><p>Why she did what she did&#8230;</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll smile at your dad&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;ll see him cry for the first time.</p><p>You&#8217;ll tell him all the times you loved with</p><p>Him&#8230;</p><p>And for some of you&#8212;</p><p>You&#8217;ll look at him and ask him why </p><p>He did what he did&#8230;</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll go out at a bar,</p><p>Drink your drinks&#8230;</p><p>wishing you weren&#8217;t  so tired from work&#8230;</p><p>And knowing that this was just a repeat </p><p>Of hiding your liquor in your energy drinks.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll go out&#8230;</p><p>Get hit by that car and wonder what</p><p>Went wrong.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>You&#8217;ll imagine being a star and having</p><p>All your dreams&#8230;but then you see that</p><p>You&#8217;re already 30 and you see no point. </p><p>&#8220;It&#8217;s never to late&#8221; you hear&#8230;</p><p>But isn&#8217;t it? </p><p></p><p>:</p><p></p><p>And the day you wake&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;ll realize everyone is living.</p><p>But You&#8217;re just here&#8230;</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being. </p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>Because the day you wake&#8212;</p><p>That&#8217;s the day you wake up to </p><p>When you enter the world.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>there&#8217;s  no escaping this reality&#8230;</p><p>There&#8217;s no going past the limits of this </p><p>Unexpected journey.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>The day you wake is the day you </p><p>Start realizing you will grow in a </p><p>World that is unmatched to your thoughts.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>It&#8217;s the day you realize that your going to</p><p>Live in a world with so many different </p><p>Perspectives.</p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And it&#8217;s the day that you wake&#8230;that </p><p>You&#8217;ll realize everyone is living.</p><p>But You&#8217;re just here&#8230;</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being.</p><p>Being. </p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>And at the end of this poem&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;ll go back and read all you&#8217;ve just written</p><p>And you&#8217;ll realize,</p><p>In this whole thing your changed the</p><p>Meaning of</p><p>&#8220;The day you wake&#8221; </p><p></p><p>::</p><p></p><p>But&#8230;maybe that&#8217;s just your way of,</p><p>Being </p><p>Being</p><p>Being </p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Mt90!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F63459173-bbb3-480f-be3c-62a42398fb04_1024x1536.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Mt90!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F63459173-bbb3-480f-be3c-62a42398fb04_1024x1536.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Mt90!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F63459173-bbb3-480f-be3c-62a42398fb04_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Mt90!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F63459173-bbb3-480f-be3c-62a42398fb04_1024x1536.png 1272w, 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y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><div><hr></div><p>&#8220;Sometimes&#8230;the world you live in isn&#8217;t the one you wanna see. Wouldn&#8217;t you think that&#8217;s perspective?&#8221;</p><p>                           &#8212;Sarah</p><div><hr></div><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://smr1432157.substack.com/subscribe?utm_source=email&r=&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://smr1432157.substack.com/subscribe?utm_source=email&r="><span>Subscribe</span></a></p><p></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/being?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/being?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share"><span>Share</span></a></p><p></p><p 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stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The 200]]></title><description><![CDATA[To You All&#10084;&#65039;]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-200</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-200</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 12 Jun 2026 06:26:59 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6Or2!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe41bebe1-38fd-4599-9bf3-0d91dd7c561e_3024x4032.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>I don&#8217;t care about the number, I care about the amount of people I could potentially be helping. </p><p>You are all amazing&#8230;or as I like to say, </p><p>~&#119813;&#119808;&#119820;&#119808;&#119833;&#119816;&#119821;&#119814;~</p></blockquote><div><hr></div><p>The 200 are the fuel to </p><p>My being.</p><p>I like to think of them as the </p><p>People who saved me from my </p><p>Scary times.</p><p>Total strangers on here and yet</p><p>I feel I have found the best people.</p><p>People who are dependable.</p><p>People who are honest.</p><p>People who write real, hit hard,</p><p>And say it like it is.</p><p>That&#8217;s what gives us strength.</p><p>We are like a hammer that catches</p><p>Peoples hand at the wrong time&#8230;</p><p>And then like the nurse that patches </p><p>the hand up.</p><p>We make mistakes.</p><p>We are creators.</p><p>We are a community.</p><p>Great people.</p><p>Wonderful times.</p><p>You all deserve the world and</p><p>A medal.</p><p>But nothing will ever be enough to </p><p>Explain how grateful I am that you all are here. </p><p>Each and every one of you matters </p><p>More than I can say.</p><p>Know that in every world&#8230;</p><p>You are worthy.</p><p>You are wonderful.</p><p>You are enough.</p><p>I believe in every single one of you.</p><p>Why?</p><p>Because&#8230;</p><p>We are the 200&#8230;</p><p>And the 200 are the builders to the</p><p>Beginning of something wonderful.</p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6Or2!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe41bebe1-38fd-4599-9bf3-0d91dd7c561e_3024x4032.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" 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srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img 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srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!PwMk!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F38f3ca0a-e851-4da8-8d8d-a0846f67b386_1254x1254.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[A Puppet’s Purpose]]></title><description><![CDATA[Volume 2 of &#8220;The Puppet Show&#8221;, A Series]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/a-puppets-purpose</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/a-puppets-purpose</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 12 Jun 2026 06:15:40 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>&#8220;There are some puppets out there who just don&#8217;t know what they are meant for.&#8221;</p></blockquote><p>&#120450;&#120462;&#120460;&#120477;&#120466;&#120472;&#120471;:</p><p>&#119827;&#119815;&#119812; &#119825;&#119808;&#119821;&#119811;&#119822;&#119820; &#119826;&#119812;&#119819;&#119812;&#119810;&#119827;&#119816;&#119822;&#119821; ~&#119826;&#119834;&#119851;&#119834;&#119841;~</p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png" width="1536" height="1024" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/a4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:1024,&quot;width&quot;:1536,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MxZg!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4742fe5-cff8-4870-990a-68119b020e22_1536x1024.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><div><hr></div><p>The puppet stands in place&#8230;</p><p>A silent dedication to his work. </p><p>The words, </p><p>&#8220;The show begins&#8221;</p><p> Haunt what he hears.</p><p>His strings grip his palms </p><p>As the humans order his movements </p><p>Around like a dog on a leash.</p><p>He preforms his greatest show</p><p>As a goodbye toward final retirement&#8230;</p><p>And he watches his owner cut his strings</p><p>With such precision that he forgets</p><p>The reason it&#8217;s being done.</p><p>And He steps freely out into the world&#8230;</p><p>Finally, a breath of fresh air.</p><p>He isn&#8217;t the thing he was created to </p><p>Be anymore.</p><p>Nor was he trained or expected to </p><p>Leap the stage while his strings untangle.</p><p>And while he sees his reality&#8230;</p><p>He sees other unowned puppets</p><p>Dance and stare&#8230;</p><p>&#8220;How do you all live this way?&#8221;</p><p>He asks.</p><p>But instead the other puppets glare</p><p>And mumble &#8220;what else are we meant for?&#8221;</p><p>Another joins in&#8230;&#8221;sometimes&#8230;the show just&#8230;</p><p>&#119838;&#119847;&#119837;&#119852;&#8230;</p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!MvKk!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F4ee7eb51-fc63-44a8-820e-f3ef97787441_1023x1537.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" 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class="install-substack-app-embed-img" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png"><div class="install-substack-app-embed-text"><div class="install-substack-app-header">Get more from Sarah-SMR in the Substack app</div><div class="install-substack-app-text">Available for iOS and Android</div></div><a href="https://substack.com/app/app-store-redirect?utm_campaign=app-marketing&amp;utm_content=author-post-insert&amp;utm_source=smr1432157" target="_blank" class="install-substack-app-embed-link"><button class="install-substack-app-embed-btn button primary">Get the app</button></a></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[…]]></title><description><![CDATA[A recording from Sarah-SMR's live video]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/2b2</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/2b2</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 12 Jun 2026 00:56:49 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/201671882/c2e7658cee749679e19b92608b703e57.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="install-substack-app-embed install-substack-app-embed-web" data-component-name="InstallSubstackAppToDOM"><img class="install-substack-app-embed-img" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png"><div class="install-substack-app-embed-text"><div class="install-substack-app-header">Get more from Sarah-SMR in the Substack app</div><div class="install-substack-app-text">Available for iOS and Android</div></div><a href="https://substack.com/app/app-store-redirect?utm_campaign=app-marketing&amp;utm_content=author-post-insert&amp;utm_source=smr1432157" target="_blank" class="install-substack-app-embed-link"><button class="install-substack-app-embed-btn button primary">Get the app</button></a></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Sleepless ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Sarah&#8217;s late night thoughts. A Random Series Of Absolutely Nothing and Nonsense.]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/sleepless</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/sleepless</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 09 Jun 2026 04:36:24 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I took my medicine </p><p>I tried to sleep.</p><p>I huddled my pillow and prayed</p><p>Like I knew what tomorrow would bring.</p><p>The truth is&#8230;</p><p>I don&#8217;t.</p><p>Maybe it&#8217;s this underlying issue of</p><p>sleep that I struggle with.</p><p>Depression makes you tired does it not?</p><p>It&#8217;s only a reasonable explanation.</p><p>I can&#8217;t keep up with it all.</p><p>Am I really ok? I&#8217;m not sure.</p><p>And as I lay here I keep thinking of</p><p>Moments that replay in my head</p><p>Like a broken radio on repeat.</p><p>Like the moment my doctor</p><p>Asked me if I see things or hear things.</p><p>It&#8217;s only a reasonable thing to ask </p><p>Considering it&#8217;s in the &#8220;script&#8221;</p><p>I don&#8217;t blame her either&#8230;</p><p>But I guess it&#8217;s been on my mind</p><p>Because who on earth is going to </p><p>Admit that, </p><p>even if they did hear and see</p><p>Things?</p><p>I mean&#8230;why would they? </p><p>People would call them crazy.</p><p>Insane.</p><p>A maniac.</p><p>Sick.</p><p>Something&#8230;feral.</p><p>Besides I think my mind has</p><p>Been on this constant relay since </p><p>Day became a chore I don&#8217;t want to do.</p><p>My room hugs me like it wants me close&#8230;</p><p>But I don&#8217;t want to hug back.</p><p>It makes me walk to it.</p><p>The darkness within me yearns </p><p>For me to love my room as much as</p><p>My family.</p><p>I promised myself that I wouldn&#8217;t </p><p>Grow up to be the teen that stays in </p><p>Her room all day.</p><p>I have broke that promise by living </p><p>In days that I gaslighted myself into thinking </p><p>Those were days I didn&#8217;t  live.</p><p>I&#8217;ve told myself&#8230;</p><p>&#8220;Just a minute in here won&#8217;t hurt.&#8221;</p><p>And I have lied to myself constantly.</p><p>I say this now&#8230;and yet I walk into </p><p>Therapy like I&#8217;ve had the best days</p><p>Of my life.</p><p>I show up. </p><p>I&#8217;m here.</p><p>And yet I lay here every night and think</p><p>Of all these things.</p><p>I&#8217;m guilty. </p><p>I&#8217;m lying to myself.</p><p>And I&#8217;m so afraid of sinking again.</p><p>And maybe everyone can tell how much</p><p>I am rambling in this.</p><p>And if you&#8217;ve been here for long&#8230;</p><p>You&#8217;d know this is a causal &#8220;Sarah thing&#8221;</p><p>Where I ramble off and talk about</p><p>All the things I&#8217;m doing wrong. </p><p>And I guess that&#8217;s ok. </p><p>I promised myself I&#8217;d be real here.</p><p>I promised I&#8217;d share the journey.</p><p>This is a part of that I guess.</p><p>A part of healing.</p><p>And I think the biggest thing that </p><p>Makes me share this is two things&#8230;</p><ol><li><p>I don&#8217;t want to get lost.</p></li><li><p>I hope that if I share my journey then maybe if someone else is going through it it can help them know they aren&#8217;t alone.</p></li></ol><p></p><p></p><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Ask anything. I’m bored. Just hanging out. Being crazy Sarah.]]></title><description><![CDATA[A recording from Sarah-SMR's live video]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/ask-anything-im-bored-just-hanging</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/ask-anything-im-bored-just-hanging</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sun, 07 Jun 2026 17:16:10 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/200986741/2e1fa579c6649f8fec13ee4b704e4a02.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;Sunruum&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:347869738,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@sunruum&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/0cb7c28c-0ab6-4d26-a943-75cbb1d3716b_1024x1024.jpeg&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;5847acd4-be74-42b4-a455-3cbbacb668ce&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>, <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;Andrew Baglia &#10024;&#9935;&#65039;&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:36765739,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@theinnercountry&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/5e2ff1ed-a0ea-4ddc-8907-f963aff91700_1484x1484.png&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;843bd1e5-4be0-4767-90d4-d50945de08c9&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>, <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;Alexey Zaitsev&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:25722524,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@alexeyzaitsev&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/d18cbd95-b4d9-4e5a-8529-ffa6e95af0b6_768x1344.png&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;a689804a-b808-41fb-b2ff-bdc105cae02b&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>, <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;The Other Ending&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:429724302,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@theotherending&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/04662018-7835-4dc2-81a9-2922678917cc_3888x3888.jpeg&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;cbf5ad12-ffcf-4891-9744-623e1af17fd7&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>, <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;Aaron Artair&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:513493831,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@aaronartair&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/cf8c26eb-7101-4212-bc4c-09592ba4757d_1733x1733.jpeg&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;3143093a-f076-43d8-875c-31b55fd49701&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>, and many others for tuning into my live video with <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;The Secret Ingredient&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:2629460,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@thesecretingredientinhealing&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!TyZo!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa9d99590-b5e8-48ef-8347-bc56aa085cdc_3344x3344.jpeg&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;02c63979-1cf2-4815-bc09-c6476924c694&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span> and <span class="mention-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;name&quot;:&quot;Ilias Shepherd Marrow&quot;,&quot;id&quot;:41212028,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;user&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@iliasshepherdmarrow&quot;,&quot;photo_url&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/525938fb-3d77-494c-81b4-33a02b0ad901_1032x1035.png&quot;,&quot;uuid&quot;:&quot;df1d270f-0d74-4bfe-92d8-4f26bab22bc7&quot;}" data-component-name="MentionToDOM"></span>! Join me for my next live video in the app.</p><div class="install-substack-app-embed install-substack-app-embed-web" data-component-name="InstallSubstackAppToDOM"><img class="install-substack-app-embed-img" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png"><div class="install-substack-app-embed-text"><div class="install-substack-app-header">Get more from Sarah-SMR in the Substack app</div><div class="install-substack-app-text">Available for iOS and Android</div></div><a href="https://substack.com/app/app-store-redirect?utm_campaign=app-marketing&amp;utm_content=author-post-insert&amp;utm_source=smr1432157" target="_blank" class="install-substack-app-embed-link"><button class="install-substack-app-embed-btn button primary">Get the app</button></a></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Calling Podcast/TCC Group ]]></title><description><![CDATA[TCC: The Calling Compass]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-calling-podcasttcc-group</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-calling-podcasttcc-group</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sat, 06 Jun 2026 23:16:25 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;ve always had this certain feeling since I was younger.</p><p>The kind that pulls you in and asks you to search for it.</p><p>And when you listen close enough, you&#8217;ll hear it calling your name at just the right volume. </p><p>It&#8217;s always been the thing I turn to. </p><p>In my head&#8230;it lingers like it loves me and keeps me up at night like it&#8217;s the only light that shields me from the dark. </p><p>I used to tell my mom that I felt like there was a &#8220;treasure&#8221; around us&#8230;something special. </p><p>I would say that anywhere and everywhere, and when I found small things out and about the feeling would almost glitch out&#8230;but return like I hadn&#8217;t came close to finding it at all.</p><p>All I would say to my mom then was&#8230;&#8221;this is cool treasure&#8230;just not the one we need to have just yet. I still feel it&#8221;</p><p>I named the feeling constantly. </p><p>People have told me it&#8217;s something called </p><p>An &#8220;Awakening&#8221;</p><p>&#8220;Spiritual Awakening&#8221;</p><p>And so on.</p><p>I do believe there&#8217;s something there. </p><p>Something beyond what I can imagine&#8230;</p><p>So I want to discover something while I uncover what this feeling is over time.</p><p>Something that can involve everyone&#8230;so maybe by time I get answers&#8230;maybe even ones I may never end up with, I can share it. </p><p>It can sound insane.</p><p>But isn&#8217;t that sometimes the fun part?</p><p>I really want to kick this off.</p><p>We will research countless different theories and techniques.</p><p>One in which I have already started&#8230;</p><p>Mel Waters&#8230;</p><p>A man who claims to have a hole in his backyard that never fills up. </p><p>No one knows what he looks like.</p><p>No one has been known to claim the land.</p><p>And so on&#8230;</p><p>That&#8217;s just some out of the many we can look into.</p><p>But we will also discover things people never ask.</p><p>Things people never question or think until they are to upfronted to see the reality.</p><p>Things that make you think enough to answer this: Have you ever felt like something was calling you toward a discovery you couldn't name? </p><p>This isn&#8217;t just about theories, historical, and so on.</p><p>TCC is a community of people following the feeling that there is always something more to discover.</p><p>It&#8217;s about finding the calling that some of us never get answers to.</p><p>And while we may not get answers&#8230;or find anything&#8212;this gives us a chance to dive deep.</p><p>This can hold anything you bring to mind. </p><p>So share your ideas. </p><p>Tell what you want to talk about here.</p><p>It doesn&#8217;t have to be related to this at all. </p><p>Listen to what the unknown has said&#8230;</p><p>But be careful and aware within its words.</p><p>Welcome to TCC!!! </p><p></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png" width="1024" height="1536" 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https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!KcUw!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F935ef9d6-1dcd-48eb-842e-0ec47a15a1cb_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>If you are interested in joining the TCC group let me know and I&#8217;ll add you on the list!!</p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!0nPo!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F00f39133-4913-454c-bfee-1a6966a052ab_1254x1254.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!0nPo!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F00f39133-4913-454c-bfee-1a6966a052ab_1254x1254.png 424w, 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stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Absolute Life. Absolutely ]]></title><description><![CDATA[A Very Old Poem]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/absolute-life-absolutely</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/absolute-life-absolutely</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2026 04:04:28 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8220;Absolute life. </p><p> Absolute Life absolutely. </p><p>Overthink. </p><p>Think to little. </p><p>At least your thinking at All right? </p><p>Not all that shines is gold. </p><p>Not all that meets the eye is true. </p><p>Twists and turns. </p><p>Winners and gold. </p><p>Not all that comes to mind is spoken. </p><p>Not all that is said is thought through. </p><p>Life itself is a mystery. </p><p>From the way you&#8217;re gonna be to the way you look and act. </p><p>Power and money. </p><p>To challenge to seceded. </p><p>One head up to one head down. </p><p>To smiles and frowns. </p><p>To knowing what&#8217;s next to never knowing what&#8217;s next at all. </p><p>That itself, is absolute Life. </p><p>Absolute life absolutely.&#8221;</p><p></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg" width="4032" height="3024" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/b10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:3024,&quot;width&quot;:4032,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!E_0G!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb10242c9-20ae-4edc-a709-13e90263e776_4032x3024.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[God Knocked On Your Door Today ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Answer. He&#8217;s in your heart. He&#8217;s always there for you&#10084;&#65039;&#8205;&#129657;]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/god-knocked-on-your-door-today</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/god-knocked-on-your-door-today</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2026 03:56:58 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sRIp!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F9e7ba135-fddc-410b-9491-167fb2287b46_1024x1536.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>God knocked on your door today&#8230;</p><p>and he said, &#8220;let&#8217;s have a drink&#8221;</p><p>But that&#8217;s not what he&#8217;d say right?</p><p>He knocked again and he says,</p><p>&#8220;I will leave you&#8221;</p><p>But that&#8217;s not what he says&#8230;</p><p>Right?</p><p>And you knock back </p><p>time after time again&#8230;</p><p>But you hear nothing.</p><p>And you&#8217;re screaming at the top of </p><p>Your lungs as you pound the wood of </p><p>The door harder and harder&#8230;</p><p>But you hear nothing but the faint sound </p><p>Of your pleas pondering back at you&#8230;</p><p></p><p>God knocked on your door today&#8230;</p><p>And he offered you life beyond what </p><p>You could imagine and he said&#8230;</p><p>&#8220;I&#8217;m always with you&#8221;</p><p>And your brain couldn&#8217;t fathom such</p><p>Things to be in your head so you said&#8230;</p><p>Nothing.</p><p>and you turned your back to the door </p><p>And he handed you a life of many</p><p>Oceans overflowing with life&#8230;</p><p>And instead your heart stoned every ounce</p><p>Of water in what you were given.</p><p></p><p>The devil has spoken&#8230;</p><p>And he knocks on every hurricane you try</p><p>To override and every storm you try</p><p>To get out of.</p><p>And you answer his calls like guilt</p><p>Hugged from his pride and </p><p>your sweat pours</p><p>From work you do not owe </p><p>All from the depths of hell.</p><p></p><p>God knocked on your door today&#8230;</p><p>And he said, &#8220;hear me. I am here with you</p><p>On your heart.&#8221;</p><p>And you didn&#8217;t listen.</p><p>You kept working in work that</p><p>Wasn&#8217;t yours to pay.</p><p>All as you answer the devil during the day.</p><p></p><p>You pound on the door to God</p><p>Like you didn&#8217;t just work in sweat digging</p><p>Your way to hell&#8230;</p><p>And you still hear nothing&#8230;</p><p></p><p>So when god knocks again</p><p>You hold your forehead against the door </p><p>And you let your heart open as </p><p>You praise some more.</p><p>The devil has lied to you. </p><p>You hold your Bible close and </p><p>You knock back </p><p>On the door. </p><p>And your eyes open to see&#8230;</p><p>The words written right in front of you&#8230;</p><p>&#8220;<em>Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me."  </em><code>Revelation 3:20.</code></p><p> <em>"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." </em><code>(Matthew 7:7 and Luke 11:9)</code></p><p></p><p><code>It&#8217;s not that he wasn&#8217;t answering&#8230;</code></p><p><code>You just didn&#8217;t open the door&#8230;</code></p><p></p><p> </p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sRIp!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F9e7ba135-fddc-410b-9491-167fb2287b46_1024x1536.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" 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stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Whence It Go Yonder]]></title><description><![CDATA[We open our book tonight]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/whence-it-go-yonder</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/whence-it-go-yonder</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2026 03:16:09 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><h5><code>We open our book tonight </code></h5><h5><code>To read why I love you all</code></h5><h5><code>So bright!</code></h5><p></p><p></p><p>Whence it came</p><p>Whence it go yonder, far from</p><p>My once pondered life.</p><p>Shall thou make me sigh into </p><p>Depths I cannot name?</p><p>I pray thee, though I cannot see</p><p>Through thee cruelty </p><p>I will fain walk away with thy</p><p>Into the world that thou dreamt.</p><p>Alas shall we stand in our sorrow </p><p>As we sweep this borrowed time.</p><p>But mark shall I take thy heart in</p><p>Time much greater than this.</p><p>Though betwixt we not notice?</p><p>Thou hast taken my heart like Poe </p><p>Singing to thous ravens in nights</p><p>And screaming through thy floorboards.</p><p>I know by thous timing&#8230;</p><p>I anon, I know it so.</p><p>I know it so! </p><p>I woe now your soul sits at the </p><p>Top of my shelf where the Raven sings.</p><p>Shall you anon with Poe while thy own life </p><p>Is bewitched under love around thous heart?</p><p>I shall go with thy upon this woeful night</p><p>And shalt thou go anon with me. </p><p>And once more &#8230;</p><p>Whence it go yonder, far from</p><p>My once pondered life.</p><p></p><h5><code>And our book closes as I hold you</code></h5><h5><code>And you know just how much I love you.</code></h5><p></p><p></p><p></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img 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srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!D1Am!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa065b28f-fb6b-4029-8b96-c56f5e3eb524_1254x1254.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>I&#8217;m not really sure what this is. </p><p>I found a modern English dictionary online and did this.</p><p>Not really sure what I have written here but here ya are!! &#10084;&#65039;&#8205;&#129657;</p><p></p><p></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://smr1432157.substack.com/subscribe?utm_source=email&r=&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://smr1432157.substack.com/subscribe?utm_source=email&r="><span>Subscribe</span></a></p><p></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/@smr1432157/note/p-200707797&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://substack.com/@smr1432157/note/p-200707797"><span>Comment</span></a></p><p></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://open.substack.com/pub/smr1432157/chat&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Join the chat&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://open.substack.com/pub/smr1432157/chat"><span>Join the chat</span></a></p><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Journey To Missing  What Music Meant To Me. ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Music Is Still Here. It&#8217;s A Love Of Mine.]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-journey-to-missing-what-music</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-journey-to-missing-what-music</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 03 Jun 2026 02:28:30 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>&#8220;Maybe I will find what I&#8217;ve been blinded from&#8230;because I love it.&#8221;</p><p>                                              ~Sarah~</p></blockquote><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png" width="1983" height="793" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/f4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:793,&quot;width&quot;:1983,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!rHuu!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff4ba58a4-eff9-4445-ba4d-fc54f9eb781c_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Sometimes I don&#8217;t really say anything&#8230;but I&#8217;ve been thinking about this. I love karaoke. I love songs. I love music. I used to do karaoke with a friend of mine at a karaoke bar. </p><p>Her mom worked at the karaoke set up and we wrote our names on the list a dozen times. I never would do it alone. </p><p>Though, i was the one invited. The guest. The one who chimes in. My friend had asked me a dozen times to sing one alone and each time I said no. Laughed it off and moved on. </p><p>Then her mom stopped working at the karaoke bar so the whole idea of going just dimmed out. </p><p>During this time I was in chorus&#8212;had been since I was younger. 3rd grade to be exact.</p><p>I made it into </p><p>honor chorus.</p><p>Statewide.</p><p>Small groups.</p><p>And a bunch of other things.</p><p>During this I got to see new places&#8230;</p><p>Ones I&#8217;ve never seen.</p><p>I loved it. </p><p>And to this day I am still in it all.</p><p>The End of 2025 was my 9th year (I think) of doing chorus.</p><p>It wasn&#8217;t until towards the end of my 7th grade year&#8230;one of my best friends moved. </p><p>But it was also the more heavy side of my &#8220;mental health&#8221; so to speak. </p><p>Moving to a year later things got darker.</p><p>This isn&#8217;t about that though.</p><p>The point of this right here is simply just owning up to the fact that I lost my light for singing.</p><p>I still sing.</p><p>Still do quiet karaoke moments in my room.</p><p>Still play videos with people singing and hum along.</p><p>But something&#8217;s not right anymore.</p><p>I suddenly felt as if I was in a wreck and now I have to recover knowing what I love doing isn&#8217;t doable anymore because of my injuries.</p><p>I&#8217;ve noticed  when I do karaoke now I make random sounds because I think I already sound bad.</p><p>It&#8217;s like I shut down.</p><p>I start the song. </p><p>Sing.</p><p>Do my thing.</p><p>And then when I go and try to make music&#8230;no matter how hard I try I never can get myself to go forward with it.</p><p>My voice sounds like a train reck now.</p><p>And a part of me is gonna regret this later&#8230;</p><p>But that&#8217;s fine.</p><p>I&#8217;d rather show off the &#8220;teen I am&#8221; or at least that&#8217;s what they say.</p><p>Now I&#8217;m trying to get my voice back.</p><p>Find where that went in the mist of the depression.</p><p>Find me.</p><p>Not that I lost it&#8230;but in time, the trust between me and my voice didn&#8217;t aline anymore. </p><p>And I think there&#8217;s a lot of characters that help me with those factors&#8212;the ones that helped me realize I still need to help the voice that is still growing. That maybe it&#8217;s the singer within me that changed from the tiredness of fighting and not the music that is gone.</p><p>And that maybe I just need to find the voice that sounds more like crying for help and fix it just enough&#8230;so I can sound like a voice that is growing. </p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg" width="635" height="319" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:319,&quot;width&quot;:635,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!FHiC!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6aa2741e-d7e0-4a83-9f03-2146ef5ab493_635x319.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Karaoke night&#8212;I&#8217;ve sung once on there&#8230;all it did was make me realize even more what I lost. But I had fun. Even though I sounded like a dying squirrel. I think seeing everyone do it and sing is something that&#8217;s helping me little by little. </p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png" width="1983" height="793" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:793,&quot;width&quot;:1983,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Oi4B!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F17b7f37f-f63f-4491-9e09-1125e9793504_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Dolly Parton&#8212;I don&#8217;t really listen to her. Nor have i met her. But knowing that in some way I am related to her as her tenth cousin&#8230;makes me feel like I am capable of making it back to my own singing journey.</p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png" width="1983" height="793" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/eb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:793,&quot;width&quot;:1983,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!5DSH!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb080c78-8d60-4729-8b01-1233a0bcbe93_1983x793.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Radio&#8212;I recently got this radio in my room&#8230;I like to change the channel a billion times and make a beat with the static. I like the precision in trying to get the dial just right so there&#8217;s no static in the background of the music. Makes me find more light in this mission I&#8217;m on.</p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg" width="452" height="368" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/b7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:368,&quot;width&quot;:452,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!6fc1!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb7b27042-4b75-4adc-b85a-ec383fe1c6d1_452x368.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>The lives where I can sit and listen to music, request a song, and hear awesome stuff about the back of these artist&#8212;those are majorly a part of this. I think it shows me how much music was my thing. Used to be my thing more than writing.</p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg" width="715" height="667" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:667,&quot;width&quot;:715,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!ndx-!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F97fec556-6aef-4389-a26b-fd9a75e4d3d2_715x667.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Music makers/DJ&#8217;s on here&#8212;give me hope. I think I&#8217;ve learned a lot and it shows me the beauty of it all. It makes it all so much more fascinating.</p><div><hr></div><p>Some people may not get what I mean. </p><p>And some people may thing I am lying&#8230;</p><p>And that&#8217;s ok.</p><p>I just know that something missing in the way I sing, the way I love music, and the confidence I had.</p><p>I wanted to thank people who have helped me with this even though they don&#8217;t really know it.</p><p>Maybe I&#8217;m Just some teen girl who is going through vocal changes and is not a fan.</p><p>Or maybe I&#8217;m being very idiotic. </p><h4>Pause&#8230;.you see that &#11014;&#65039;&#11014;&#65039;&#11014;&#65039;&#11014;&#65039;&#8212;I&#8217;m not going to delete that. But I caught it this time. And I&#8217;m gonna leave it there so maybe you can see what I mean when I say what I did.</h4><div><hr></div><p>If you&#8217;ve heard me sing here&#8230;</p><p>Consider that wrong.</p><p>Because right now&#8230;it may sound horrible. It may sound bad. But I will keep working until I get back to what I had&#8230;or to what I can have.</p><p>So if i trip up and say no to singing&#8230;after i had the confidence to say i would&#8212;know that i&#8217;m just either nervous&#8230;or I&#8217;m just having a day all up in my feels over this matter. And it may seem silly. And I may sometimes just have other things to do. </p><p>But in the end&#8230;I want my love for music to stay. And I wanna find trust in it all again. It&#8217;s not about having a good voice, or anything like that. It&#8217;s about being able to sing and have fun without doubting myself on something that I used to be so proud and happy with. </p><p></p><p></p><p>I will take that back.</p><p>And thanks to you guys&#8230;I think I&#8217;m a little closer to getting there each day &#10084;&#65039;&#8205;&#129657;</p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png" width="1024" height="1536" 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https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!sERO!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Feb347717-7e00-4355-ac45-f31307879bdb_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[All In A Confinement Cage ]]></title><description><![CDATA[&#8230;Something Random. Something Feral. Something Somewhere Where They Hurdle And Call. Just Something&#8230;I Guess.]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/all-in-a-confinement-cage</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/all-in-a-confinement-cage</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 02 Jun 2026 05:15:06 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>All in a confinement cage&#8230;</p><p>The days roll by slow.</p><p><code>I do not breathe anymore.</code></p><p>I suffocate.</p><p>I isolate.</p><p>I disintegrate.</p><p>All from impact I have drowned in.</p><p>I wake to nothing. </p><p>I sleep to nothing.</p><p>So am I living?</p><p>I am not me.</p><p>I am no shadow.</p><p>This is no riddle.</p><p>This is truth.</p><p>The blood falls beneath </p><p>My eyes and I do not flinch.</p><p>Is it really blood I am seeing?</p><p><code>I&#8217;m still not breathing.</code></p><p>I lay down.</p><p>I stare at ceilings I</p><p>Cannot see.</p><p>I cannot move anymore.</p><p>I have read these words before </p><p>Like I know what I am.</p><p>I remember writing it like I&#8217;ve</p><p>Been here before.</p><p>I follow the map of my heart</p><p>And yet I have no steps to carry</p><p>And no heart to map out. </p><p>I watch homeless steal </p><p>And money grin. I give </p><p>A helping hand. </p><p>Though, I have no help</p><p>To give from the hands I&#8217;ve</p><p>Done wrong in. </p><p>I have smiled at a child,</p><p>Even though I have no ability to.</p><p>I yearn for hugs i cannot give.</p><p>For something with nothing is something&#8230;</p><p>So what &#8220;something&#8221; can I give if</p><p>I consider myself nothing? </p><p><code>I. CANNOT. BREATHE.</code></p><p>My screams aren&#8217;t being heard,</p><p>For I have no vocals to be proud.</p><p>I don&#8217;t know who I am. </p><p>I wanna be the blank space </p><p>In your mind&#8230;</p><p>Though I have no ability to want.</p><p><code>I CANT BREATHE</code></p><p>Because all in a confinement cage&#8230;</p><p>The days roll by slow.</p><p>I do not breathe anymore.</p><p>I suffocate.</p><p>I isolate.</p><p>I disintegrate.</p><p>All from impact I have drowned in.</p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_1456,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png" width="1024" height="1536" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:&quot;normal&quot;,&quot;height&quot;:1536,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:0,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_424,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_848,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_1272,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 1272w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!RAdl!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c5e98aa-11cf-46b1-b17b-9eed254a1644_1024x1536.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg role="img" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[I Don’t Wanna Grow Up]]></title><description><![CDATA[Late night rambling with Sarah&#8230;(who doesn&#8217;t know what in the world she&#8217;s talking about)]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/i-dont-wanna-grow-up</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/i-dont-wanna-grow-up</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 02 Jun 2026 04:22:10 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I don&#8217;t wanna grow up. </p><p>I know that&#8217;s something everyone says&#8230;</p><p>But when I say it,</p><p>It&#8217;s different to me.</p><p>I wanna drive.</p><p>I wanna have my own house</p><p>To escape to.</p><p>I want a family and I </p><p>Want cookouts and</p><p>Fires with s&#8217;mores.</p><p>I want it all.</p><p>But I also don&#8217;t want to lose this&#8230;</p><p>People will just see a writer.</p><p>There&#8217;ll be nothing special about it.</p><p>I&#8217;ll still write real.</p><p>Probably crash out some over </p><p>Life struggles&#8230;</p><p>But it won&#8217;t be the same. </p><p>Wisdom will be presented as something</p><p>I&#8217;ve had but people will see it as:</p><p>&#8220;well she&#8217;s an adult&#8230;&#8221;</p><p>And I&#8217;ll never be seen truly.</p><p>I feel as though a lot of people will read</p><p>This and think&#8230;&#8221;they will see what we see now&#8221;</p><p>No&#8230;I don&#8217;t think so. </p><p>I think they&#8217;ll just see an adult doing</p><p>Adult things and what they love.</p><p>As of now I&#8217;m classified as</p><p>A teen that has no idea what she&#8217;s doing&#8230;</p><p>But also doing something here.</p><p>They will see me as every other adult</p><p>Writer on here&#8230;and I&#8217;d love it&#8230;</p><p>I would be making impact&#8230;</p><p>And yet it will never be the same as now.</p><p>When you read this&#8230;</p><p>I may sound kinda stupid&#8230;</p><p>Maybe because everyone has to grow up,</p><p>And I&#8217;m just not&#8230;&#8221;mature&#8221; </p><p>But I also mean way more than I&#8217;m saying.</p><p>Once someone new comes along as I&#8217;m</p><p>An adult&#8230;they won&#8217;t see this version Of me.</p><p>Not the one that is fighting.</p><p>Not the one that is seen here.</p><p>Just some adult writing something to make an impacT (that still means the world to me) </p><p>But if anyone gets what I mean&#8230;</p><p>I guess that&#8217;s something. </p><p>People say &#8220;don&#8217;t grow up to fast&#8221;</p><p>I don&#8217;t wanna. </p><p>Nor am I trying to.</p><p>I just don&#8217;t wanna grow up.</p><p>And that is hitting a lot right now.</p><p>Probably dramatic.</p><p>But I&#8217;m ok with that.</p><p>The cruel part of me is gonna regret this harmless write later&#8230;oddly enough.</p><p>But I won&#8217;t listen to it.</p><p>I simply just have this hit me once in a while.</p><p>It&#8217;s not about the age&#8230;but it&#8217;s about </p><p>The differences that people take upon them.</p><p>I hope somewhere out there people see between the lines here because all I&#8217;m trying to say is stuck.</p><p>In the end I know this&#8230;</p><p>Maybe I do want to grow up or I don&#8217;t. Idk </p><p>But I just don&#8217;t want people to forget what</p><p>We are doing now.</p><p></p><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Man That Pondered His Properties.]]></title><description><![CDATA[The Man Will Secede His Tears]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-man-that-pondered-his-properties</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-man-that-pondered-his-properties</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 01 Jun 2026 18:26:14 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!d45X!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21c4229b-fd31-4f58-a203-20dce5814a77_1054x1492.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><blockquote><p>To you&#8230;</p><p>&#8220;You are allowed to yearn even if it&#8217;s like roots spreading to someone&#8217;s veins.&#8221; </p></blockquote><div><hr></div><p>I have sat here and watched</p><p>This man ponder over his properties.</p><p>He has taken every shovel and tool to</p><p>His use.</p><p>He takes them to bury his pain.</p><p>And when I stand he doesn&#8217;t</p><p>Look at me at all.</p><p>He simply hits his knees against the</p><p>Deep soil.</p><p>And he takes a watering can of his tears </p><p>To water his plants&#8230;</p><p>Because perhaps his tears are aloud to</p><p>Be shown somewhere.</p><p>And when I kneel beside him </p><p>He doesn&#8217;t flinch.</p><p>He simply throws his fists at the ground </p><p>Like it&#8217;ll make his heart hurt less.</p><p>&#8220;Why shall you hurt yourself </p><p>Over the people&#8217;s doing?&#8221; I ask him.</p><p>And he breaks like the wind in him</p><p>Was set free and he looks at me</p><p>And says,</p><p>&#8220;Because the world is hurting to.</p><p>And I wanna cry like any human.</p><p>I want to grow my plants like </p><p>Life lines to save me from this </p><p>Darkness I&#8217;m in.&#8220;</p><p>and when I search his face my</p><p>Hands yank off his label and</p><p>Price tag.</p><p>&#8220;No more properties.&#8221; I whisper.</p><p>And he takes the tags from my hands and</p><p>Buries them with the rest of his plants.</p><p>&#8220;These will stay by my children&#8230;&#8221; he mumbled</p><p>And by then&#8230;my expression shifted.</p><p>It&#8217;s not what he pondered but </p><p>What he yearned that made him</p><p>Think he wasn&#8217;t deserving of showing his </p><p>True Colors.</p><p>So maybe as I sat there and watched </p><p>This man ponder over his properties,</p><p>He was really grieving what he couldn&#8217;t </p><p>Watch grow anymore. </p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!d45X!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21c4229b-fd31-4f58-a203-20dce5814a77_1054x1492.png" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!d45X!,w_424,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21c4229b-fd31-4f58-a203-20dce5814a77_1054x1492.png 424w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!d45X!,w_848,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21c4229b-fd31-4f58-a203-20dce5814a77_1054x1492.png 848w, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!d45X!,w_1272,c_limit,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21c4229b-fd31-4f58-a203-20dce5814a77_1054x1492.png 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stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><title></title><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Veins Within the Mirror ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Keep going&#10084;&#65039;&#8205;&#129657;]]></description><link>https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-veins-within-the-mirror</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://smr1432157.substack.com/p/the-veins-within-the-mirror</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Sarah-SMR]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sat, 30 May 2026 01:11:22 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!7jaZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd121f8e9-1f5e-4f02-b9ba-428a116c8a24_1170x1170.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>You are capable of making it far in this journey. Never give up on yourself. </p><p>And read between the lines&#8230;this says more than you think&#8230;</p></blockquote><div><hr></div><p></p><p>I want you to pick up that mirror </p><p>You stare into and follow the path of every</p><p>Vein you see in view.</p><p>And while your on your journey,</p><p>I want you to stop by the heart store&#8230;</p><p>One where you need to buy a ticket </p><p>To love and know that you are enough.</p><p>I want you to follow the path in </p><p>Such a way&#8230;</p><p>That when you encounter the cruelty</p><p>Of others, you know that hearing such things</p><p>From people does not define you.</p><p>Their words are not what make up </p><p>The words within our dictionary.</p><p>And deep down&#8230;as you stumble back</p><p>On your route&#8230;I know you know who you are.</p><p>That&#8217;s all you need to continue.</p><p>And you&#8217;ll continue on your way anyway. </p><p>So, know that when the bad turns to the snakes on the enemies head&#8230;it&#8217;ll turn </p><p>Everyone to stone.</p><p>It&#8217;s important you keep up your part.</p><p>Because you&#8217;re capable of fighting for yourself.</p><p>Your strong. </p><p>Your enough.</p><p>Your worthy.</p><p>And you&#8217;ll continue to make the impact on the world that you set out for.</p><p>So never give up.</p><p>Never shatter the mirror to end the journey.</p><p>Because even when a slight part of the</p><p>Mirror breaks, </p><p>The store sells more that&#8217;ll never be the same.</p><p>So save your anger for the love in your heart, and take the journey far beneath your veins.</p><p>And know that the enemy will create</p><p>Its own version of medusa turning to stone.</p><p></p><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item></channel></rss>